Lying In A Reflection...

Chapter 1 

A mirror stared into the void of the empty lobby of an office building. Faint noises from surrounding spaces broke the silence now and then, but there was a calm that encased the blank mirror. It waited patiently for a muse to fulfill its purpose. Someone to come and see the beauty that they were created in. However, it was still early; there was time before the rush of people arrived. Or so it thought. Within a moment, a face flashed by then reversed and paused to fluff its hair, and then it was gone again. Another passed, this time zoning in on the mirror the first time around. And so on. Until around noon when a girl walked up to the mirror like she had an invitation. She was shorter than most who showed their face earlier that day, however, there was something big hiding behind her eyes that it couldn’t quite reflect a sunbeam on. It caused the mirror to feel uneasy. It needed to know, but the moments were ticking. The mirror knew the patterns of people, knew how they came and went, how they showed interest in themselves for seconds, only to either walk away satisfied or with an expression that made the mirror want to call back to them. If only it had a voice. The moments were fading, and yet she neither checked her lipstick nor fluffed her hair. Her body didn’t twitch for her to melt back into the fast-paced life thrown at people. She stayed. And stared. Like that scene in “Pride and Prejudice” when Elizabeth gets lost in the void of her reflection. The girl's brain was roaming her thought files when suddenly the mirror understood. It wanted to leap off the wall and cease to exist or to flash subtitles and remind this girl who she was. 

Chapter 2

Sad eyes…small mouth… a disproportionate nose… is all she saw. She took a deep sigh while her eyes stayed locked in on the glassed-over ones staring back at her. She typically couldn’t handle looking into a mirror, but this one seemed to take her attention. Something pulled her to stop. And as the busy people roamed around her she felt stuck in place. Every mirror seemed to mock her. The thought of having to stare into one caused her to cringe both internally and externally. So what was different about this one? This one caused her thoughts to reel, but her body remained still. She was tired from a night out with her friends the day before which showed from the bags under her eyes. Her hair expressed its disapproval of the humidity that flowed outside, and her heart felt like someone suddenly grabbed hold of it and squeezed. It almost took her breath away. The reflection told her of a woman walking behind her who looked well put together with a head held high and a heel placed perfectly in front of the other as she walked with intention. Her vision snapped back to the face that was before her. Her lungs expanded deep and slow. Then reduced back to normal as she felt her posture melt like fondue. Was it defeat? Had she given up? Would she ever be the woman she so desperately tried to be? “You will never look like her. She is probably naturally skinny. And she was blessed with good hair and skin. Fashion comes so easily to her. Gosh, she’s probably smart too, one of those smart ones without needing to try types.” 

“Try again.” Something flashed in her mind. But no one was around. That didn’t sound like her brain voice though. She looked up and around while her face remained glued to the mirror. 

“Great, now I am hallucinating.” Her thoughts rolled their eyes. 

“Or did you?” At that moment, a sunbeam ejected off the mirror into her line of sight. But, as quickly as it had come, it was gone. Her eyes had squinted, breaking her connection to her saddened self. She saw the woman she had deemed perfect hunched over in a chair behind her. Her hands hugged her stomach. A sign of discomfort. Something sparkled as it journeyed off her cheek, shattering onto the floor. 

Chapter 3

The mirror was trying its hardest to make the woman before it understand. No life was perfect. Lies. That’s all she was telling herself. Lies of her imperfections that she saw as flaws that were her greatest assets. Lies of others triumphs and flawlessness without seeing the truth that screamed, “We are all human!”. A mirror has no words, but the compassion it felt for the human race was growing as it learned that someone could package themself into a box of self-loathing while claiming they never rewrote the truth. The mirror wanted to reach out a hand and lift the girl's chin to tell her she was beautiful, and for her to actually hear it. Tell her to stop listening to the lies she was buried in. To tell her she was beautifully and wonderfully made. That when she looked in the mirror she should be proud. To understand that life isn’t easy, and that she would need to continue to work to be the woman she wanted to be, but it is achievable with effort and an open mind. She was more than her reflection. She was more than the person she told herself she saw. And while the mirror was dreaming of ways it could tell her its thoughts, the woman's face lifted. Life came back to her eyes, those same eyes that it had been trying to open this whole time. A smile spread over the woman's face. Not a big one, but one that melted into place like warm chocolate. Soft and gentle. Proud. Her posture followed by growing tall and strong. It sang determination. The mirror felt relief while simultaneously feeling excited by the way that the woman was able to reflect onto herself the attitude she deserved to carry around. The mirror now felt as though it was a priceless piece of art. With one last look, the woman walked off. 

Chapter 4

How many times in the day do we look in the mirror? And how many of those times do we love everything about what we see? Why is that? Why do we tend to criticize and fantasize about something different? We all experience good days, but more often than not we pick ourselves apart to where it hurts the longer we see our reflection. A quick glance here or a pose there, we pretend that we are happy. But, when it comes down to it, we struggle with standing bare and accepting who we are. How sad that we can’t find comfort in who God designed us to be. And how God designed us to fluctuate, to ebb and flow through different phases, seasons, and occasions. But, also to be unique in our appearance, the way we talk, the way we think, our interests, our attitudes, and how He shaped our faces. God hand chose them all and as hard as it is to not compare or to wish for something else, we were created as one of a kind. Rare. We don’t see nature being ashamed of who and how it was created. Because it was created beautifully. And so were we.

Next time you stare into a mirror and feel the self-destructive thoughts creep in, begin to find things about yourself that you enjoy. Maybe it’s one thing. Start there, grow, and stop allowing yourself to lay in the lies that you tell your reflection. God made us. And with every flaw, imperfection, fluctuation, and struggle we are someone who should stand tall. You’re beautiful! I hope that you had a great week! Enjoy the weekend and don’t forget to subscribe, follow on Instagram, let me know if this is encouraging so I know what you guys enjoy reading, and share The Allie-Way with someone! Thanks for reading Allie-Cats!

• Dru Allie